Advice for the Recent Grad, and the Rest of Us

With graduation happening at many high schools across the country and the recent graduation of my youngest sister I decided to take this week’s post in a direction that focuses on some advice that I want to communicate to her; that being said, this post is not going to be directed at her specifically but to everyone who is graduating or may be entering into a season of their lives in which there is drastic change. Though it is more focused on the graduate I believe that this post will benefit anyone at any stage of life.

Growing up in the great generation that society and the media has labeled “the millennials” we have quite a negative stigma that is directed towards us. This stigma says that we are all lazy, we are all dependent, and we are all entitled. Those in the older generation are very unsettled and uneasy about the direction the country will be heading once we come of influential age. The sad thing is that a lot of what they say is true; many of us are lazy, many of us are dependent, and have a sense of entitlement. But perhaps what is even sadder, is the fact a lot of what the older generation has done and the philosophies that have been carried over from the 60s-70s are what has shaped our generation. We grew up in a world where everyone got trophies just for “participating”, we have never been told no, we were told happiness is the end goal rather than the product of the end goal, we were told to not put limits on any aspect of our lives, our parents were told if they used corporal punishment it was abuse (and if they did use corporal punishment we would have trouble seeing the “grey area” in moral issues). If I keep listing things I could probably fill up several pages, and that is not what this post is about so I will move on.

It shouldn’t come as a surprise that our generation has so many things stacked against us; that being said, there is a way to overcome this stigma but it requires changing your mindset from the conditioning that has taken place throughout our lives. Perhaps the first and most important piece of advice that I can give you is that your happiness is not the highest virtue of life. Happiness is not a goal to be achieved but is the product of achieving your goals. A good example of this alleged “truth” being false is to look at your parents. When people become parents their happiness gets put on the back burner and their primary objective is to ensure the well-being of their children. There can be no doubt that children can be a source of happiness in a parent’s life, but if a parent’s sole concern was their own happiness then what kind of life would the child have? Chances are that the child would be miserable and neglected. Don't get me wrong happiness is a great thing to have but it is something that we are never promised nor guaranteed. 

The second piece of advice that I can give you is to come to the realization that pleasure and pain are amoral; meaning pleasure is not necessarily morally good, nor is pain morally evil. Life is going to get hard sometimes, maybe even harder than you think that you can handle, and I am not going to say here that God won’t give you more than you can bear because that isn’t Biblical. But I have come to learn that from most forms of suffering there tends to be a lesson to be learned from it. Scripture says that from the bad things, God will work them towards our good. We are never promised that we wont go through tough times; in fact if we can learn anything from scripture it is that we can be assured that tough times will come. But when they do come, scripture shows us the right way to handle the obstacles that are thrown our way, and how to find joy in the suffering.

The third piece of advice that I would give to you would be to stop thinking about yourself as an island, because you are not. By this i mean stop allowing yourself to maintain the "me" mentality. When we enter into the “real” world post-high school and even college, we take on the role of a citizen, where the actions and choices that we make do not just affect only ourselves but everyone around us both directly and indirectly. Living life for ourselves ultimately ends in isolation. The concept of individualism is great but you cannot forget that you are an individual who is a part of family, state, country, etc. that is made up of other individuals. Every action that we make bears a consequence and it is irresponsible to not think of those consequences. If Christ only thought about himself and his well being I don't think that he ever would have went to the cross, but the amazing thing is that his thoughts and love for all of us are what drove him towards the ultimate sacrifice.

Finally, the last and perhaps most cliché piece of advice that I can give to you is to keep God first. As overstated as this phrase is, it carries more connotations than what one can perceive from the surface. Before we make a decision, and we pray and ask if what we are doing or about to do is keeping God first it affects the end result. It affects everything, and that is the beauty of it. It is a principle that can be played out in every aspect of our lives. It is a big world and the greatest way that I have found to maintain your sanity is by keeping Christ at the center. Entering into college and a world where you’re free from the rules of your parents, it can be easy to take the opportunity that is before you to rebel. But what is the purpose? Is it fun? Sure, but what are the benefits for your life in the long run? The truth is that there aren’t any good things that can come from living life in a way that is ultimately destructive. It doesn’t help you get a job, create healthy relationships, create a healthy lifestyle, or become successful. 

You are an adult now and the world is going to treat you as such. Don’t live up to the low expectations that the world already has for you.  Prove them wrong, there is nothing more fulfilling than being an overcomer, and that is what I believe our generation is. We are the generation that will overcome the lies that have been spoken over us, and the obstacles that have been placed before us. The only way that this will be possible however is if we realize that it is a tough world and we will need to be tougher. I leave you with a quote from the Apostle Paul found in 1 Corinthians 13:11 "When I was a child I spoke like a child, thought like a child, reasoned like a child. When I became a man(adult) I put away childish things." 

The Least of These

We see them everyday, when we go out for groceries, dinner, the movies, and even Church. Yet so often we don't seem to acknowledge them, and if we do it is always with hesitation and negative presuppositions. The them that I am referring to are the "outsiders" of society, those who live on the fringes, the homeless, the poor, and the destitute. Often times our judgments and stereotypes are correct but they are also just as often wrong. 

It just so happens that the current city in which I live is permeated with the poor, and the homeless. Little Rock has a major homeless issue and is considered to be one of the worst towns for homeless people because the number of shelters is sparse. There isn't a day that goes by usually that I don't encounter one of these individuals. About three weeks ago I was out for a walk near my apartment when I was approached by a man who asked me for some money. I typically do not carry cash on me but I knew I had some in the apartment so I asked the man if he would wait while I went to grab some since I was less than 100 yards from my apartment. When I returned he began to tell me how he was recently released from prison and that he had found God while he was there and was able to get out early on good behavior. From the very moment that he began speaking to me I immediately thought "here we go" because it has been my experience that tale being told is usually a tall one. I gave him a few dollars, some water, and I prayed with him. The last thing that he said to me was that I wouldn't see him again because he was heading home to Conway. When he said that I was inclined to believe that maybe the story he told me was true. 

It wasn't even a week later when I was sitting inside the apartment with Katelyn that I heard someone knocking on the wooden fence around our patio. I go out to see what is going on and lo and behold there is the same man who told me that I would not see him again. He told me that he was never able to get a ride into Conway and that he lined up a ride and just needed a little cash, all I had was 2 bucks so I gave it to him. He told me how it bothers him when people don't believe him just because he is on the streets, but here he was a week later after telling me I would never see him again. I will admit I was a little bothered by the fact that he was gutsy enough to come to my apartment, the intent I had with leaving him and going to the apartment to get some cash was so that he would not know where I lived. But since I study on my patio often it stands to reason that he must have seen me there before. There is a part of me that feels like I was lied to and violated. There is another part of me that was initially concerned for the safety of Katelyn, and our belongings inside of our apartment. However, it has been over two weeks since I last saw him, so I am hoping that he really was telling the truth.

This encounter has been weighing on my mind a lot lately and has drawn me into deep reflection. While reading through Luke recently I was confronted with a part of scripture as I believe probably happens to most of us that convicts us deeply and I thought I would share that with you. Throughout the scriptures Jesus tells us that we are to take care of the poor, it is one of the most popular topics in scripture. Why is it that Jesus tells us to do this so much, and why is it often so hard for us to do? A portion of scripture that I think will help us shed some light on this is found in Luke 14. Starting in verse 7 the scriptures talk about how Jesus told a parable about a banquet. Jesus continues this banquet theme in verses 12-14 where Jesus says not to invite your friends and relatives to your banquet because they will repay you, but instead invite the poor because they will never be able to. Then in verse 16 Jesus began to tell them about a man who gave a large banquet but those who he had invited were giving excuses as to why they could not come. Because those whom he had initially invited turned him down, he decided to invite those on the outskirts of society.

There are a number of different interpretations that are applicable to this group of scriptures, however, there is a certain aspect that I really want to focus on. What really confronted me about these passages of scripture is the way that our relationship with Christ is mirrored in the relationship to the banquet host and the outcasts that he invited. There is something about the emphasis on the fact that Jesus says we are to invite the poor due to the fact that they will never be able to repay us that really hit home with me. Not only does scripture command us to assist the poor, it does so without offering conditions. There is never a phrase that starts out "Help the poor, unless..." No in fact, Matthew 25: 40 says that whatever we do for the "least of these" we have done for God. The reason that this is important is because this relationship with the poor like I said before mirrors Christ's relationship with us. Jesus came to the Earth, and was rejected and crucified by his own people. These are represented in the parable as the people who he sent out invitations to but made excuses as to why they could not attend. Upon his death and resurrection his grace and salvation was offered to all of mankind, his table was opened up to everyone. What is most remarkable about Jesus' sacrifice was that he knew full well that there was nothing that we could ever do to repay him for it. Yet, he offered it freely and to everyone. He offers it to the liar, to the thief, to the adulterer, the murderer, etc. It is completely unconditional, the only thing that we are required to do is accept his generous gift, and allow the Holy Spirit to transform us.

Just like the man who I ran into on the street while out for a walk, who may have been lying to me, who may have never accepted Christ like he told me, who very well may have been a murderer, is the same way Christ found me. Spiritually I was on the street, lost, and with no hope. The commandment of helping the poor is not necessarily for the benefit of the poor but to serve as a reminder to us as believers what God did for us. Jesus died on the cross even though he knew some of us would reject him, that we would squander his precious gift, that we would waste it, that we would never improve our lives, that we would still stumble and fall. Just like when we give to the homeless, they may go and buy drugs, they may squander the money, they may never get off of the street. Yet we are not only obligated to help them but we are to do so unconditionally. Now I am not trying to say that we should always give them money, there are other things that we can do to help them. The best example of what we can do is found in Acts 3 when Peter and John stumble across the beggar in the street. Being poor themselves the only thing that they could offer was the most precious gift of all and that was the good news of Jesus Christ. If nothing else we should always pray for those in need, and give them the Gospel. Which in all honesty is much more difficult to do than to give a couple of dollars. Often times we think they don't want to hear about God and that they probably either don't believe or that they despise him. Something that I have found however in my interactions with the homeless is that this idea couldn't be farther from the truth. Often times I have found that they are very receptive and at times possess greater faith than I probably ever will. It is strange that it is often so much easier for us to open our wallets than it is to open our mouths and share the message of the Gospel.

Something that I want to challenge you all to do as Christians is the next time you encounter someone who is on the fringes to not allow harsh thoughts towards them to be our initial reaction. Instead we should remember that this is the same way that Jesus found us, and knowing full well we may lie, he gave anyways. If and when you do encounter one of these individuals I would admonish you to offer them if nothing else a prayer and the Gospel message of Jesus.

Becoming Authentic

         

I am sure most of you have seen or heard of the latest poll results from the Pew Research Center pertaining to religion in the United States (For those of you who have not, here is the link to their official site). The media has been abuzz this past week with headlines that proclaim Christianity is on the decline, and the numbers of those who refer to themselves as being unaffiliated with any religion  is on the rise. However, these headlines can be quite misleading if you don't look at the research for yourself. It has been my experience that, in these types of situations or most situations, it is better to go straight to the source. The purpose of this post is to examine the Evangelical church as it relates to this poll, what it means for Evangelicals, and what I believe the answer is.

I have provided an image of the main chart here on right side of the post for you to get a quick visual rundown of the statistics. At first glance, these statistics are quite unnerving if you find yourself in the Christian camp. As the graph clearly shows, there has been a 0.9 percent decrease of the total population that claims to be Evangelical, a 6.7 percent increase in the total population that is unaffiliated,  Catholics with a 3.1 percent decrease, Mainline Protestant 3.4 percent decrease, and a 1.2 percent increase of those in other faiths (Jew, Hindu, Buddhist, etc.). If you are looking at this chart and are an Evangelical, like myself, you are probably thinking to yourself that things are not looking good for us; but you should be aware that as the percentage of the total population leaving other denominations increases, as well as those becoming unaffiliated and joining other faiths increases, our market share is going to decrease. 

So what do these numbers then mean for us? I think it means that the way that we have been doing church needs to change. But before I get to that, if you will just give me a moment to climb upon my soap box and tackle an issue that I believe has gone unaddressed and avoided for far too long and with far too many reasons  excuses.

Christianity in this country, quite honestly, whether you want to accept it or not, is under attack. Now that I have that statement out of the way let me begin by saying that we have it easy as Christians in the United States. Are we being murdered for our faith? No. Are we being beheaded? No. Are we being imprisoned? No. However, this is happening to our brothers and sisters in the Middle East, yet there are not too many of us who seem to be concerned; in fact, if many of us were in their shoes, when a gun was placed to our heads we would gratefully give up our faith. One of the reasons the percentage of the population who claim to be Christians in this country is on the decline is because we absolutely refuse to take a stand. We have allowed ourselves to enter in to a time where the only religion that it is okay, nay accepted, and expected, to be made fun of and degraded in this country is Christianity. And let me be the first to admit, there is much that can be made fun of about the American Church as it is today. If we will be honest with ourselves, I believe we can concede that we have given society a lot of ammunition. But let me just ask this one question: Whenever the contest for drawing the Prophet Muhammad happened in Texas, and two jihadists showed up with the intention of massacring those in attendance. Who was it that the media chastised? Was it radical Islam? The short answer, no. But if you turn the channel and happen to land on Family Guy, you will most likely see a depiction of Jesus Christ that is obscenely irreverent yet where is the ridicule of Seth McFarland from the media? Heck, in just about every television show Christians are made to be the fool. Yet we just sit idly by; so why should it come as a surprise to anyone that our numbers are in decline and that everyone has remained silent on the treatment of Christians in the Middle East and other parts of the world?

Now let me get in to the nitty gritty of the main reason I think that there is a decline in the church, especially among millennials. In this chart on the right you will notice that the number of those who claim to be Evangelicals is actually experiencing growth; in fact, from the research provided by the Pew Research Center, poll-conductors say that the amount of growth might actually be higher than that which is charted due to their margin for error. (Americas Changing Religious Landscape, 9) So what then is the big deal? Why are so many people leaving other denominations? Why is the number of those who claim no religious affiliation growing? And why is it that the Evangelicals seem to be the only ones experiencing growth? I think that it has a lot to do with this one word and that is authenticity. Let me first say that I am not going to say that Evangelicals have it all together when it comes to actually being authentic in the way that we do church. In fact, my biggest frustrations that I have with the Church is the sheer lack of authenticity; but I will say that I believe we are doing better than most, though we could definitely do better.

For those of you who are like me, and by like me I mean a millennial, we have the good fortune of being the Church's target demographic. Since this is the case, there has been a drastic shift on the way things are done inside of our churches. Perhaps the largest attempt to gain our attendance is the use of "relevance". The church has become obsessed with being culturally relevant. We have become so consumed in our quest for this seemingly mystical and mythological position of relevance that we have, in some cases, compromised in key areas. Please understand me, I am not talking about allowing people to drink, (I cannot in good conscience say that this is sin), or people who do not attend church every single Sunday morning/night and Wednesday. This is not what I mean when I refer to compromise. When I say compromise what I mean is exchanging the truth of scripture, the black and white, plain as day word of God, for something less. In fact, we have compromised in many more areas than just our doctrine. Our worship, in many cases, has become more like a concert than focusing on and tuning our hearts to God. Our sermons have become more like pep-rallies instead of challenging us to better ourselves, and to actually think about the scriptures for ourselves. We scream that we offer community from the mountain tops, yet we are prone to cliques. The Evangelical church of the west has sacrificed authenticity on the altar of relevance, and it is time we resurrect her. Authenticity, in word and in deed, is what the millennial seeker is starving for. It isn't all about the fancy lights and awesome songs. It isn't about singing strictly from the hymnal and only having an organ either. I believe there can be, and is, authenticity in both. It is time the Church takes a good hard look and that we ask ourselves if we are being authentic. 

Being authentic, for me at least, consists of several things and I think that many of you can agree with most of if not all of them. (These are in no particular order).

1. Becoming missional minded.
So many times in the Church we become so consumed with what is going on inside the four walls of our buildings that we forget the Church is made up of people and that there are more of them outside the walls than there are on the inside.

2. Being honest.
So many times we tend to not be honest. And it isn't that we lie intentionally, but it does mean that a lot of our teachings and doctrine exist because of something man has said, not something God has said directly through scripture. Being honest also means accepting and understanding that we are not finished struggling with our sinful nature until we reach Heaven. If we could, then why did Christ die in the first place? Understand, however, I'm not trying to excuse sin. We must always be repentant and allow the Holy Spirit to guide, grow, and change us.

3.Understanding that worship begins in the heart.
It isn't about the songs that we sing but who we are singing to.

4. Understanding that Spiritual gifts are not strictly meant for church services.
This point comes from my charismatic back ground. So many times I hear people say, "Oh that church is not spiritual because they don't end every service with a major altar call," or "Only one person or maybe no one speaks in tongues." This mentality has got to stop. If we restrict the Holy Spirit to Sunday morning, and that is the only time we exercise our gifts, then we are the ones who are missing the mark. I believe that is what I have heard many preachers refer to as becoming "spiritually fat"; your cup is running over, but it is not running over on to anyone else and you end up drowning.

5. Increasing our focus on discipleship.
Often times we tend to forsake the few for the many, and instead of encouraging community we do the opposite. Jesus spent the majority of his time with the 12, not with the multitudes; just remember it was the 12 who changed the world, not the thousands who were eventually calling for his death.

6. Finding balance. By finding balance, I mean that we need to strike the perfect harmony between being authentic and relevant. We can still be relevant without having to sacrifice the fundamentals of the faith. In situations, where faith and culture cannot be reconciled the Church should not become transformed by culture, rather the Church should work towards transforming Culture. This should always be done through love, and relationships, and showing the world that what we have to offer is better.